Fuckity fuck!

Sorry for the drop-off in posting, dear Readers. Who knew that unemployment could be so time-consuming?

The past week or so has been a flurry of resume-bombing, recruiter visiting, freelance translating and binge drinking (big surprise on that last one there). I’ll get back into the blogging routine as soon as I can, but for now let it just be said that, for as long as I’ve been doing this blog, I’ve felt a certain sense of pride in the rirekisho category you see there on the left. I can safely say it’s the best English-language guide to writing a Japanese resume that you will find, period. It trounces a lot of the Japanese-language guides I’ve seen as well.

It is also, I’ve come to learn, sort of crap.

Last week at the Hello Work employment service center, my counselor turned out to be an absolute rirekisho wizard. Or sorceress, I guess. She claimed not to have been doing the Hello Work thing for long and wouldn’t tell me what her previous job was, but she took a pencil to my rirekisho and the suggestions she made were incredible. My rirekisho pops in a way it didn’t before, and it’s all thanks to her.

peI have also, at long last, encountered that most dreaded of rirekisho — the kind that must be written by hand. Jesus H. Fucking Christ. That was not a pleasant afternoon.

In any case, I’m going to have to do some serious updating to the rirekisho walkthrough to incorporate this new information.

Sigh…

Say a prayer for my rirekisho. Say a prayer for this gaping-ass hole in my mouth where a sideways wisdom tooth used to be.

And say a prayer for my groin. Just because, as I’ve mentioned before, I really like the word “groin.”

p/s – Do magazines here really need to feature Korean actor/girlyman Bae Yong Joon, aka “Yon-sama,” on no less than five covers? I put to you that no, they fucking don’t!

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11 Responses

  1. I wonder, pray tell, if “loin”, “purloin” or even “Battle of the Boyne” also tickle your fancy? Or is it just groin…

  2. Go rirekisho! Maybe once you are somewhat stably employed again, it might be time for an update to the award winning rirekisho page?!

  3. Well if it needs to be written by hand then you can pretty much say i’ll never get another job with a Japanese company. Fuck, i can barely write English by hand.

  4. @Neil: simple. Pay JT to write them for you!

  5. I now know the guy I hate, Bae Yong Joon, It’s wrong to judge on appearance, but every time I see this guy wisping onto the tv screen I feel an incredible sense of wanting to punch him in the face.

  6. I HATE Bae Yong Joon too. It’s annoying that he’s also famous here in Thailand and many of my friends are crazy about him. Ugh, he doesn’t look at all like a man to me.

  7. @ englishman, I do like the sound of “loin” and “purloin” as well, but there’s just something about the hard “gr” sound followed by “oin” that cracks me up.

    @jeshii, yes, I’ll most definitely be updating the walkthrough when I have the chance. I also plan on finally getting around to posting about the cover letter and how to navigate a Japanese-style interview.

    @Penguin, it better be *a lot* of money. This writing by hand nonsense kills me. And the constructive criticism: “Your handwriting is very good. It looks like a native. Someone in elementary school, maybe.” Fucking terrific.

    @Peter and Natta, thank you!!! I hate this guy so much, preening Nancy boy that he is. Not only do I totally fail to see the appeal, he bugs the hell out of me. Someone needs to invite Kurt Russell over here to kick this guy’s ass.

  8. Seriously, isn’t the whole “Hello Work” experience something to write about? I’m curious how it looks from the eyes of an american, I’ve heard about it from Japanese friends and it seems kinda rough!

  9. Haha. Nobody’s mentioned the keitai strap lurking in the bottom corner again. And is that the tip of a fucked-up shoe that I can see there too?

  10. LOL! That is indeed a keitai strap and a fucked-up shoe. Was wondering if anyone would catch that.

    And yes, that afternoon at the Hello Work would make a blog entry in and of itself. What a friggin’ nightmare!

  11. “Someone needs to invite Kurt Russell over here to kick this guy’s ass.” Yeah, Kurt Russell or Chuck Norris. Nice roundhouse kick (-; LOL

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